We all have that one friend (or more, if we’re lucky) who either already has everything they want, or have interests that the average mortal may furrow their brows trying to comprehend. In either case, playing Secret Santa for that friend may be more frustrating than getting through a game of Minesweeper without detonating any mines.

After Goop released their Ridiculous but Awesome gift guide, we were inspired to curate one of our own. We channeled our inner Barney Stinson and Phoebe Buffay to come up with this gift guide for the loveable eccentrics in our circle. You’re welcome.

For the cuddler: Golden Retriever Plush Cuddle Animal Body Pillow

Who needs a boyfriend pillow when you can have a life-sized dog pillow? W plowhearth.com

For the quirky dresser: Watermelon Tote

Have your oddball friend know: this painstakingly handcrafted work of art (or bag, if you will) by Japanese leather craftsman Yusuke Kado was created especially for carrying just one watermelon. W tsuchiya-kaban-global.com

For the sharp-witted: SOG throwing knives set

…to hone their skills at carving the best slice of life for themselves. W knife-depot.com

For the odd nose: Yankee Candle Sweet Nothings

So, your friend’s not a fan of the usual floral/earthy/musky/spicy scents? Perhaps a jar of Sweet Nothings is the answer. W yankeecandle.co

For the mildly aggressive: Throw Throw Burrito Board Game

From the creators of the award-winning card game, Exploding Kittens, comes a new kind of mildly aggressive board game that “weaponises Mexican food for fun”. W throwthrowburrito.com

For the patriot: One&Only X Jay Ahr keepall

Launched as a one-of-a-kind custom-designed Louis Vuitton keepall specially crafted by Jay Ahr for the One&Only National Bag series, this RM55,000 Malaysia-exclusive piece is a tribute to our country’s heritage and is found only at One&Only Desaru Coast, Malaysia. W oneandonlyresorts.com

For the eco-conscious alcoholic: Air Vodka

This vodka is distilled using nothing but water and carbon dioxide so your friend can drink responsibly for the environment. W aircompany.com

For the tastemaker: L’Objet x Haas Brothers Monster incense burner

If the average home fragrance doesn’t cut it for him/her, this conversation-starter of an incense burner might. W farfetch.com

For the Harry Potter fan: Royal Selangor Harry Potter wand

“You’re a wizard, [insert name here]” – the best news any Potterhead can receive. W royalselangor.com

For the vintage lover: Gucci cloche with wolf

This decorative silver-plated cloche from Gucci’s “Souvenir from Rome” collection comes complete with a 3D wolf head, “Gucci” engraving on one side and “Loved” on the other, for that friend to cover food…or their deepest, darkest secrets. W gucci.com

For the Star Wars nerd: Ultrasabers Lightsaber

…to show your support for their true calling to become a Jedi Master. W ultrasabers.com

For the pet owner: Petements Hawaiian shirt

When all else fails for your friend, get something for your friend’s furry best friend: a Vetements outfit for pets. W farfetch.com

For the one who doesn’t share food: Friends Tea Towels

It’s from Pottery Barn, no less. (If you know, you know). W potterybarn.com

For the king of dad jokes: The Very Embarassing Book of Dad Jokes

Perfect for that friend with jokes so bad, some of them are actually good. W amazon.com

For the weird bff: Anissa Kermiche Breast Friend ceramic vase

You could say we’ve saved the breast for last. W farfetch.com